Friday, August 3, 2012

A Mother's Love: Deep and Enduring for a Lifetime

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Recently, the nation was mesmerized by a absorbing news story of an Indiana woman who lost part of both legs while protecting her children from a tornado.

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Stephanie Decker of Henryville, Indiana, knew a tornado with fierce 175 mile per hour winds was raging towards her 3 story brick home. She took her 8 year old son and 5 year old daughter to the basement, wrapped them in blankets and lay down on top of them to safe them.

The entire house collapsed on top of them and Stephanie suffered 7 broken ribs, a punctured lung and lost parts of both legs from the steel beams, bricks, furniture and framing that collapsed on top of her. Miraculously, both children survived without an injury.

"I call myself a mom," she said. "I love my kids...I wanted to do whatever I could to safe them. I think any parent would."

Watching this story on the news, took me back to the day my first son was born. I remember being approximately stunned by the depth and intensity of the love I felt for this newborn baby who I had nurtured and cared for in my womb for nine months.

Living in Nyc at the time, I remember thinking that I'd take a bullet if I had to, to safe this precious life while walking colse to the city and riding the subways with my child wrapped securely in his snuggly up against my chest. There assuredly isn't whatever we won't do for our children to keep them safe and well.

As parents we want to offer the best education, experiences and opportunities that we possibly can to our children.

If we are lucky, we experienced this same love and sacrifice from our own parents.

Which brought me to thinking about...

... The millions of Baby Boomers and adult children who are so involved today with the condition and well-being of their own parents. We've come full circle and now we find ourselves with the same emotions and desires to safe and look out for our parents as they face the many distinct challenges and difficulties of aging, whether it's dementia or Alzheimer's, strokes or Copd, heart disease, osteoporosis or many other conditions.

Our caregiving is an act of gratitude for the things our aging parents did years ago to offer us the best life inherent and to never feel neglected or abused.

We look at the care we give to our parents today as our gift back to them, not a burden on our shoulders. It reflects the love we have for our parents. And that love nurtures us all.

I'm not saying it doesn't get difficult or scary at times. We all have moments when we are stressed, tired, confused and overwhelmed by adding the care of our parents to an already very busy life.

But we are willing. The depth of our parents' love for us and ours for them knows no bounds.

And just as we left the hospital with our babies many years ago-wondering how to be good parents-with no manual, coach or mentor besides our own parents and upbringing to guide us, today we find ourselves seeking the tools and data to help us find the answers we need to help our folks.

Yes, we all have many, many questions, such as
Fortunately for us, there Are Many resources ready to help us on this caregiver's journey. And it's a growing list everyday. Just today our local paper announced the opening of another home condition department to meet the growing interrogate for services that allow an elder to remain in their own home safely.:

What are my parent's limitations? How do I know if they are still safe in their own home? What type of care does my parent need? How rapidly might their needs change? Who is ready to come into the house to help, such as a visiting nurse? Will my parent resist an surface someone helping with day-to-day care? Am I capable of handling this on my own, emotionally and physically? Can I afford an sufficient care facility? What are my local options? What is the best way to cope my own stress and personal well-being?

Most communities provide multiple options to help you get these questions answered and come up with a plan. These options include, but are not small to:

Geriatric Care Managers Councils on Aging Elder Care Services Home condition Agencies Hospice Care Elder Care Attorneys Certified Senior Care Advisors

Most of these whether provide or can direct you to someone who will help do an appraisal of your parents' current needs and what to expect as you move transmit with whatever condition they might be dealing with.

In expanding to the many sustain groups that are ready in local communities, there are many assuredly great online sustain groups that can help you get questions answered and feel supported, even when you can't get away to attend a local group.

Some 'LinkedIn.com Groups' that I have found helpful include:

ChangingAging Adult Children Caring for Aging Parents Caring in the Usa Network Elder Care Matters HomeCare and condition Care Advocacy

Yahoo and Facebook also have some groups centered colse to house caregivers. Just use the 'Search' box on whether site and a list will pop up.

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